Day 13 – “Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”

evanlaird.com - _Nothing can be done without hope and confidence._
So how does this step by step help me build confidence? It just seems like a framework for achieving my goals?
And that’s the exact point. 😉
Confidence stems from doing and achieving.

“Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”

So the fact that you’re doing something you value and hold highly in your life is what is building your confidence. Stringing together victory after victory each step knowing you’ll achieve it because you reached the last 5-6. Without noticing the momentum, you made towards your goal built up your confidence.
Now when you look at new struggles of goals, you have the confidence to say I made it through that, or I achieved this. So why would this new challenge be any different?
reaching-your-goals
Just like knowledge and skills can be built through repetition, so can confidence. And by taking small actionable steps, you’re doing and did just that!

My personal fitness story of building one step at a time

To give a personal story of how this works, I can take you back four years ago at the start of my life-changing journey. I didn’t know it at the time but the small steps and decisions I made my freshman year of college ultimately shaped where I am today.
Luckily I was naturally a bit more confident than others growing up due to my brother, father, and the values instilled in me when I was young. But 18 and 60 lbs overweight with a girlfriend that cheated on me and broke up with me, my confidence was shattered.

Adding each little step

I made the conscious decision to lose some weight to regain where my standards were. So every day I did more and ate a bit less. I didn’t make dramatic changes as I was already hitting the gym. But I slowly swapped unhealthy meals with healthy ones. Starting with salads for lunch, slowly eating smaller more protein-packed breakfasts throughout six months.
In the gym, I started pushing myself harder and longer. Slowly increasing my workload and benching 145lbs one week and each week adding 2-5lbs hitting a new PR every day in every lift. Letting the snowball and compound effect work naturally.

Confidence bleeding over into the rest of my life

Before you know it those good habits lead to great habits in other parts of my life. Slowly drinking less, doing drugs less, studying more, and feeling better about myself. Through time as these achievements compounded my mansion of confidence was being built.
I started looking at every challenge just as that a challenge, not an indestructible wall. Knowing that if I was able to lose 60 lbs, double my strength, and turn my F’s into A’s that with the right amount of confidence and determination I can then achieve anything I put my mind to.
Evan-Laird-2017-Transformation

Being able to look back on the journey

It’s been a long journey of 4-5 years now. And yes I still struggle but not with the same problems as those are long behind me and accomplished. They don’t even cross my mind, because I’m working on bigger and better things.
And that’s where we are getting you to, to understand that it’s a long journey and not a sudden bang of change. But far enough along into it, you’ll be able to look back and smile and laugh about your old challenges. And be able to look forward on a better life with the confidence that you can tackle anything that life throws at you.
evanlaird.com - _Nothing can be done without hope and confidence._
Push through,
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Evan

Day 12 – “You can’t put on the roof before laying the foundation.”

"You can't put on the roof before laying the foundation."

Let’s continue with one of the last notes about steady achievement and building your confidence.

“You can’t put on the roof before laying the foundation.”

Take everything you do especially in the process day by day and step by step. We both know that 1 lb. might seem like a small change as does $5. But life, recovery, your road to success and confidence is not a Sprint. It’s a marathon. And each step gets you that much closer.

marathon-not-a-sprint

The beauty of this mindset and framework is twofold: you don’t bite off more than you chew and secondly, you are continually achieving your goals (building confidence and momentum).

Don’t bite off more than you can chew

To address the first, one of the primary underlying reasons for failure and a lack self-confidence is biting off more than we can chew. Trying to rush success and trying to find glory in the achievement, not the process. By keeping steps small and building our mindset of daily progress and achievement, we are in turn sculpting the foundation to your confidence.

But if you get too far ahead of yourself and try to do too much, your building will collapse. You can’t put the roof on before the foundation of even the walls or set. Or your building will be a pile of crumbled rubbish.

That’s what we are avoiding — the burnout of trying to chase a huge goal then giving up one week later because it’s too big of a change. And humans naturally are resistant to change. Our minds are built to survive and revert to the mean.

Constantly hit and celebrate small goals

What we are doing by hitting constant small goals is slowly upping our standards, expectations, and in essence our mind and body’s mean. So that when we subconsciously revert to the mean, it’s higher than the day before.

Stay the course and don’t get ahead of yourself chasing your ultimate goal. Reach your ultimate goal by using this framework to build towards it every day. Watch the snowball effect take place, and you’ll reach your goal without even noticing how much you’ve changed and good you’ve done.

Push through,

Evan Laird Signature

 

 

 

Evan

Day 11 – “Momentum is real. Build it in every step.”

evanlaird.com - _Momentum is real. Build it in every step._

If you haven’t read the last two articles, it’s highly encouraged as this is part of a series of building your confidence.

“Momentum is real. Build it in every step.”

Like we discussed the first step is the hardest. Now that you’ve started you have to decide to halt your progress. And that’s what most do.

evanlaird.com - _Momentum is real. Build it in every step._

Taking the next step

After the first step, they believe they completed their ultimate goal which is far from the truth. You have to set your second, third, and fourth step immediately after completing phase one.

Step one is far from your goal, but it shouldn’t be now from your second goal, and that’s where people get lost. They get the hit of dopamine, that feeling of satisfaction after goal one and decide it’s enough. Then go back to there old ways to try again later, a vicious cycle.

Avoiding your old ways

That’s not going to be you!

Because you’ll set, you’re second, third, fourth, and fifth step towards your goal immediately. Using the same framework as before and taking a small measurable value up from step 1 and setting that goal.

So awesome, you made $5 more this month or lost 2 pounds in a week. You’re a killer! But predators never stay satisfied. So lets up the stakes. Now make $20 more dollars then $50 more than $75 more. Now lose 4 pounds, 5 pounds, 7 pounds.

$0 to $100 is a big jump. But $5 to $20 is a simple step. Make them simple, doable, and building on your day off progress. Take each step and celebrate each step and continuously add another step afterward. That’s your award.

 

evanlaird.com - _Momentum is real. Build it in every step._

Push through,

Evan Laird Signature

 

 

 

Evan

Day 10 – “A mansion is built one brick at a time.”

"A mansion is built one brick at a time."

If you missed yesterday, I highly suggest refreshing your memory.

We discussed that building confidence starts with a straightforward step – Setting up the achievement for yourself. Now I know what you’re thinking, didn’t we do that with the vivid vision?

And yes of course! But that’s your long-term three-year plan which we need to dissect and put into a 3 hour or 3-minute plan for you to take the first step.

“A mansion is built one brick at a time.”

Yes, I said mansion, not a house because that’s not what you’re building. You’re creating a masterpiece, a work of art with your vivid vision, not a standard Joe Schmoe house.

mansion is built

Read your vivid vision

Let’s take a look at your vivid vision. Read it aloud again.

Selecting your domino

Now select the section that means the most to you. The part of life that if this all goes correctly, all the rest will fall in place. For me, that’s my career. If my career goes as planned it will free me up to open relationships, give more time to learning, family, and leisure.

One thing to make sure is you can directly impact this outcome. For instance, you can’t make someone fall in love with you, but you can work smarter, put more effort into existing relationships, or lose a couple of pounds.

Select your domino.

domino-effect

Finding goal number one

Take the section and find your first goal or stepping stone in there. Now let’s dissect that goal and work backward.

So if your goal is to lose 30 pounds or make $200k a year, you know what you have to do before that?

You have to lose 25, 20, 10, or even just 1 pound first. You have to make $10k, $5k, $1k, or even just $1 more a month.

And that’s your first step to building the confidence that will eventually snowball.

Break your first goal in your domino category into the smallest numeric measurable unit. And achieve it. Celebrate it because the start is the hardest part.

"A mansion is built one brick at a time."

Push through,

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Evan

Day 9 – “Find your confidence… Not just in your good but your struggle.”

"Find your confidence... Not just in your good but your struggle."

I’ve decided to cut my journal out of each post. At least on regular days where big things and life lessons were few and far between.

For a few different reasons:

  1. My life’s boring and I don’t want to bore you with that. Ride my bike, work, PT, eat some chicken, fall asleep. Repeat. So I’m saving you from that!
  2. To focus more on the quotes and positivity. To give you actionable tasks and thought processes to help you make it through a trial in your life. Or just everyday life because I know sometimes it’s not easy and your back feels against the wall in all realms of life.

One topic I have yet to discuss that I genuinely believe is at the core of living your best life is confidence.

“Find your confidence… Not just in your good but your struggle.”

Being self-confident is the number 1 determinate towards success. If you can see it, believe it, and have faith in it as we talked about you can ultimately do anything. When you realize that, that’s pure confidence.

Confidence doesn’t come overnight, and it’s not just a mindset. It’s your lifestyle; it’s how you’re wired. And like a house, no matter how tangled the wires are, with enough help or training you can rewire your thought process.

Confidence through achievement

I feel the first step to gaining confidence is achievement. And no I’m not talking about winning an award or bring praised at work. I’m talking about small personal achievement. Something that after your done your mind will release dopamine and you’ll feel better about yourself than the first time your Instagram picture got more than 100 likes.

But how do I do that??

We’ll discuss tomorrow so tune in!

"Find your confidence... Not just in your good but your struggle."

Push through,

Evan Laird Signature

 

 

 

Evan