Once someone meets me and truly sees who I am, they notice one thing in particular.
My unwavering ability to be who I am and all that I am.
People have pointed it out at clubs, bars, and music festivals as I dance the night away without the need for alcohol.
Women have mentioned it time and time again on first dates as I splurged out my passion in every story I tell.
The people close to me can feel it. It’s almost as if it oozes out of me with my shoulders up, chest out, and a charming little smile on my face.
It wasn’t always that way.
I used to be shy, scared, and timid. And although always a larger male, I would shy away from confrontation and being my full self as I got ridiculed time and time again.
So when I was finally able to love myself and step into my own, I have the ability to appreciate it from both sides.
And the most significant factor that’s brought me to that point (besides the Lord and the help of others around me) is that I’ve had a clear vision of who I wanted to be.
When I made my life transformation, I had a crystal clear vision of the man that I wanted to build.
Notice: I said build, not become. To be the man that I wanted to be, I had to destroy who I was. I had to lay a foundation and continue to build on top of that, according to my and God’s vision.
And that’s why I radiate confidence today.
Not because I think the world or others owe me something or that life’s going to be handed to me. But because I know if I put in the work, I can take it.
Because everything I’ve done was with intention.
I had a vision when I was a 270 lb alcoholic that was failing out of college that I would have a six-pack. A vision that I would be a successful entrepreneur, that I would have a family that was proud of me, and that I could walk into a bar and have women not just accept me but approach me (because I had been rejected so many times before).
I’m confident because the man that you see today was not given this but built this from the ground up.
And I want the same for you.
I want you to walk around with unfathomable confidence that wakes up those around you. That makes your day brighter, and you become the sun lighting up the world around you.
So I’m going to take you through an exercise I’m doing and suggest you do as well.
It’s been titled “The Man I Want To Be”.
Now that it’s the end of the decade and the start of a new one, it’s the perfect time to reflect on the past and create a clear vision of where you want to be.
So as you sit here in 2020, start to ponder, how do I see myself in 2030? What would my dream life look like in 2030? If I were living in my happiest life in 10 years, what and who would be apart of it?
From there, once you have the overarching vision of truly where you want to be in 10 years, you can reverse engineer that and create steps that will take you there.
Every step adds another notch of confidence to your belt. I genuinely believe it’s impossible not to be confident if you are working towards and living out your purpose, passions, and dreams.
The Man I Want To Be At 33 (2030)
I’ve separated mine into five sections that I want to be essential pieces of my life come 33. It feels weird writing some of this (especially since I know deep down I’ll be posting this to the public, and I barely know what my life will look like in ten days, let alone ten years!). But if I don’t write it down or if you hold back on who you truly want to be out of the fear of failure, ridicule, or what others think, you’ll never step fully into yourself, and it’ll never come to pass.
So without further ado, allow me to introduce you to (and myself I guess) to Evan Laird at 33 years old in 2030.
There are a few promises I can give my future wife today right here right now.
As a husband and partner in life, I promise never to settle. Okay or average are the worst words to my ears and will never settle for just okay for us and our relationship. I chose you intentionally because I knew deep down that you were the one for me without a doubt in my mind.
I will give my all to you. I promise to give you everything in me so in return you can give me everything in you.
I promise to care for you and provide for you. And I’m not just talking about financially. I’m talking mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I will be your rock. The one you can lean on. And the one that picks you up when you are down even when I am weak.
Lastly, I promise to love you, endlessly. Shit, I don’t even know who you are yet, and I already know the love I have to give will make you sick!
At 33, I will be the husband every man wants their daughter to marry. One that provides cares and loves their daughter endlessly. I want to be and will be the man that you dreamt of as a little girl. There to sweep you off your feet when you least expect it.
I will be there for you every step of the way as we continue to make strides in this crazy thing called life. As we slowly together create our future and the life of our dreams.
I know I’ll never be perfect, and nothing in this world will ever be, but as a husband, I want to make you so wildly happy that you never have to second guess that we were meant to be.
And that’s the kind of Husband I want and will be at 33.
As a father, I look at the way I was raised. I like to think I turned out pretty damn good, but unsure how my father and parents were able to make that happen.
They did a hell of a job by instilling the correct values in my siblings and me. And they have always been supportive of our paths in life.
The only thing I can ask as a father is to emulate that. And if I can do half the job that my father did providing for us, caring for us, and doing everything in their power to push myself where I am today, I would consider that a success.
I promise to be the father that spends time with their children, to be at every possible event, and to show them that I’m not only their coach, mentor, god-given guider in life but their biggest cheerleader.
I promise to support and love my children and give them every opportunity to grow into the man and women they not only want to be but are destined to be.
I promise not to be the easiest father, but the one that pushes them to be better pushes them to grow and gives them every opportunity in life to succeed and learn from my mistakes and others.
I promise to be a role model. I promise to be a God-driven man with a purpose, passion, and a zest for life that my children are not forced to follow but want to follow. I promise to be their guiding light in the darkness of life.
Last and most certainly not least (this probably more for my future wife but don’t judge me), I promise to be the best and hottest DILF y’all ever seen. No lie, a life goal of mine is to be able to roll up to Kindergarten or a PTA meeting with my kids and have all the Kindergarten teachers talking about how attractive Mr. Laird is. As I said, don’t judge me, this is my life. LMAO
And that’s the kind of father I want and will be at 33.
Leading not just by words or titles, but actions and example has always been in my DNA.
Over the next decade, I have not only taken a step as a leader in business or through influence, but in faith.
I’ve taken God’s blessings of that confidence, outspokenness, and life transformation to guide and lead others to their personal and God-given missions.
I have a business that not only impacts the clients’ and customers’ lives but makes a noticeable impact on people’s values, lives, and happiness. My business and its culture radiates sunshine from all angles. Together between my employees, me, and our service, we create a ripple effect of gratitude, happiness, and joy through the world.
I not only speak on business but my profound strength. I use my life transformation and success as God’s testimony that when you have undying faith, God will always pull through.
I speak at events, churches, and stadiums a crossed the world, leading people closer to their dreams and alignment with God’s mission and vision in their life. I not only spread God’s word through action and example but spread it directly. Something I’ve been too timid to do in the past.
One substantial promise I have to those that I will lead is this: I will always lead by example.
I will lead us into our battles on the front line. Whether they be financial, emotional, spiritual, or physical battles, I will not only be your side but at the forefront, ensuring your and our collective success over whatever you or we might be facing.
Gifts are meant to be given.
And what God has gifted me, I will give.
To me, giving doesn’t mean just money.
Each and every day, I give happiness, joy, gratitude, positivity, and confidence to those in need of it. Why? Because God has gifted my life with those.
I give my time, our most valuable resource, to those that need it the most. I give my strength to those that are fighting battles. I give my love to those that were thought of unlovable. I give hope to the hopeless.
Last and certainly not least, I give my faith to those that are lost.
At 33, I take time, money, health, and everything God has gifted me through life and give to others, so they are able to have the same transformations that I have. So they can walk through life with the utmost faith, health, confidence, and love.
When I’m 33, and when I face the end of my life, I want to be remembered as a giver over a being a father, leader, husband, traveler, or speaker.
This is one thing I can promise everyone in my life. Those that I give to, those that I lead, my children, family, and wife; I’ll never be complacent.
I will never settle for average.
I’ll never stop striving to be better.
I’ll continue to grow in all aspects of life.
And that’s what traveling encompasses for me. It’s not to say I’ll always be out of the USA or always jumping from place to place. But it’s the fact that I’ll never stop putting myself in situations that force me to grow.
I will continue to experience new beautiful places, cultures, food, and more that create a more well-rounded and empathic man.
I also want to give this experience to those in my life. I want to give my wife, children, and family the ability to grow, push themselves, and see the whole beautiful world that God created.
This so we can not only grow personally but grow together towards our mission and vision of our lives and build stronger bonds and better relationships together.
I promise to everyone in my life that I’ll never stop being curious. I’ll never settle for anything less than amazing. And I’ll never stop striving to become not a perfect man but a progressing man every day.